My Renewal

Today was a blessed day. One that I am privileged to participate in once every year since I became an employee of the company that Shall remain in ConfIdence. It is that auspicious occasion of renewing my core training classes on office safety, sexual harassment, back safety, fire safety, and how to tell on co-workers (that's not the name of it, but it's what it boils down to.)

I was taking my "Pre-Test" to see if I could skip the course and I began to notice something. I noticed that, like so many other training classes, these tests had EXTREMELY OLD PICTURES. They were probably taken before computers were even invented, well, other than the bulky one displayed in one of the pictures. I found this quite amusing and thought I'd share a pic or two.... well okay, three! Why is it that in a training class created only a couple of years ago, do we have "Brady Bunch" hair and "Gilligan" graphics? The people in the pictures probably don't even know that you can get sued for sexual harassment, or that by wearing a back brace and lifting with your knees will prevent the odd event of your intestine protruding through your abdominal muscles. Anyway, I wonder if you find these pictures as funny as I did.

The first picture is of that weird guy in the office that is always staring at you. You know the one, he watches out the window to see your every move, if your a man, he's trying to catch you stealing the scotch tape, if you're a woman.... well, he's just watching you for no other reason but that. Kinda creepy, but do you notice that the two guys in the foreground are watching some guy in the background putting something in his trunk? What is that?? Why was it in my training course?

The second is just in case you don't know what it looks like when someone yells "FIRE" and people run. Maybe you need a sample 60's shot of a smokey lounge. Relax, Bob just burned his oven bake burrito!!

But wait, there's one more, my favorite. This one is of an EXTREMELY dedicated secretary. Someone thought they'd be funny and stick a sparkler behind her computer to make it look like it's on fire. Someone has a sense of humor, but Wyleda is not falling for it, she has important work to finish. What in the WORLD??? Like you'd be sitting there typing if your 82 model IBM suddenly exploded!! Maybe that company needs to update their equipment. I admire you, Wyleda, for your dedication to your job.

So, here's what I learned today. Stop, Drop, and Roll; the P.A.S.S. technique for your fire extinguisher, Pull the pin, aim it, squeeze the trigger, and sweep across fire, HANDY HUH! Also, think twice before saying "HI" to your co-worker, they might take it the wrong way and sue you or cause you to do jail time with that creep in the first picture.

Re-training, what a cherished event!

-approved by Farley Wells who just got slapped by our secretary.