We had the funeral today for a 33 year old that was killed Monday in an auto accident. I spoke of him in a brief post on Wednesday that is no longer available on my blog. You have to read often to catch these things. I couldn't leave the story on long or "big brother from Houston" might catch me and fire me for it. For those who caught it, you know what I'm talking about. Well, today was that day. A funeral that is one of those that I dread more than any. Believe it or not there are good funerals and bad funerals for Funeral Directors. Good funerals are those who were for someone who lived 100 years and out-lived all of their friends and family, or those who suffered for a long time with a disease and now they can finally rest in peace. Bad funerals are those for people who were much too young to die, those who have little kids, or those who are just kids themselves. I hate working bad funerals, which unfortunately I did today.
My whole staff on the service was in tears before it was all over with. Before the service, I went back to get the family together in the fellowship hall and have them line up to be seated for the service. As I was standing there talking to the wife of the deceased, I felt this little hand reach up and grab my pointer finger and held on tight. I looked down and it was the deceased man's 4 year old daughter. She just stood there and held my hand the whole time I was talking. She walked around with me and everything. When it was time to go into the sanctuary, I asked the little girl if she wanted to walk to her seat with me or her mom and she said me. I was heartbroken because I really think that I was a "substitute" for her dad's hand. I walked her down to her seat and had to pry her little fingers off of mine. She is such a sweet little girl and it breaks my heart to know that she will have to grow up without her dad.
After the service, I went down for the final viewing. There she was, she said to me, "I want to see Daddy." I asked if it was all right and her mother said yes, so I picked her up and took her over to the casket. She leaned over, patted her daddy on his chest and said, "Goodnight Daddy, see you in heaven. I love you." Oh my goodness! I lost it, with everybody else there. It's not that often I cry at a funeral, but there was no way out of this one. I just felt so bad for them. The whole service has just gripped me and has not let go. I'm sorry for being so deep with this post, but I just had to type it out and get it off of my chest. I'll always remember this little girl and how she showed me the love she had for her daddy. There's no doubt in my mind that she was a "Daddy's Girl." I'm sure it will be tough for her for a good while. Please pray for her and the family. They desperately need it!
-approved by Farley Wells, CMDI.
9 comments:
I will be praying for them. This is heartbreaking. I'm in tears just reading this, it must have been ten times worse being there with that little girl. How awful for that family.
Lynn thanks for sharing this post. It was great that such a tender hearted man like you could be in her dad's shoes today. She needed you to show her it was okay to be sad. You will never know how much you really meant to that little girl today.
What a great post. This is what separates you and daddy from the rest of the funeral directors in the world.
I agree with Kassie 100%! Lynn, you and your family have been so caring for us during our losses. I will never be able to say how "cared for" we felt when ya'll were "taking care of us". It means the world to me to have had the "love" we had. THANK YOU!!!!
Lynn, this has to be one of the most "moving" posts I've ever read!! I've often admired you and your career, and now I see why. Thank you for being so caring and sensitive to those in need. I'm crying right now as I type, so I better end my response. Keep up the good work!!
I, too, agree with Kassie. Your family has a touch that most funeral directors don't have. Y'all have done a terrific job with the losses that our family has gone through. What a chance to minister to those that are in need!
Words fail me at this moment - but know that I'm in COMPLETE agreement with Julie K. and Kassie.
Well said Kassie, What a touching story! Perhaps you should begin to compile something I don't know if you would be allowed if you had the permission of the families! There is nothing like death to put life into perspective!
Lynn,
The mom of this little girl came in yesterday while you were off and before she left, she made a point of stopping and telling me how wonderful you were and are for the families that we serve. She said all of the family was very shocked at how caring you are and how you treated her little girl. She said you made a huge impact on her little girl and she has not stopped talking about "that man that held my hand when daddy died." WOW!
You ARE a GREAT funeral director (probably because you were trained by the best!).
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